Almost two!

What a busy time it is for my family! We are getting ready for the big move in four weeks, so the preparations have been keeping us occupied. We got home a few days ago from a four-day house-hunting trip in Redondo Beach, California. Since we’ll only be there a year, we are going to rent. I look forward to telling you all about our new home. :-)

Sometime in the past month, the boys officially put infancy behind them and became full-fledged toddlers. And boy—whoever made up the term “Terrible Twos” wasn’t lying! Nate, in particular, has been treating us to tantrums whenever he doesn’t get his way. These tantrums usually occur at the most inopportune times—such as during their two-year photo shoot over Memorial Day weekend. We took the boys for their photos early because our beloved photographer, Julie Pearson of Julie Pearson Photography, is moving as well. Unfortunately, Nate decided he did not want his picture taken, and screamed and cried for almost the entire half hour. Luckily, he has the most adorable boo-boo lip:

Nate boo-boo lip

Matt, on the other hand, continues to be a generally laid-back, agreeable little dude, as evidenced by this photo from the shoot:

Matt smile

But that doesn’t mean that Matt doesn’t have strong opinions. He does not like to share, and if Nate has something he wants, he won’t let it go easily. We’ll often catch the boys chasing each other around the house, screaming and babbling at each other, as they try to grab a toy out of each other’s hands. It’s actually pretty hilarious. Matt also will put up quite a fight when we take him away from something he’s engrossed in. Just try to take him inside for a diaper change when he’s playing with his trains and see what happens!

The boys have also grown up in other ways:

Vocabulary: That “twin language” you always hear about is real! For the past couple of weeks now, the boys have been having full conversations with each other. To us it sounds like gibberish, but I swear they each know exactly what the other is saying. Their vocabularies are also expanding at warp speed. They both count to 10 and sing along to many songs. They’ll also repeat everything they hear. And they surprise us every day by pointing at things they see in books or in everyday life and saying their names. Some of the latest things they’ve identified are rainbows (“bay-bow”), monkeys (“muh-mee”), chicken (“chichin”), newspapers (“noo-paper”), and bulldozers (“bull”). Matthew has also taken to saying “Oh, YEAH!” “Oh, boy,” and “Oh, well” all day long. We’re not sure where he got those expressions from, but he likely picked them up from us!

Interaction: For the longest time, the boys would simply play alongside each other. Now they play with each other—when they’re not fighting over toys, of course. They entertained themselves for hours in the hotel room last weekend by playing hide-and-seek with the curtains. One would hide behind the curtains, the other would “find” him, and then they’d laugh gleefully and chase each other. The boys also love to wrestle, hug, and tickle each other. But my favorite is the way they take care of each other. Each morning, whoever gets changed first makes a beeline for the kitchen to get his cup of milk. But now, instead of just getting his own milk, he’ll point to the other boy’s cup until we give it to him, then bring it to his brother. Or if you bring one boy his shoes, he’ll try to put them on his brother’s feet instead of his own.

Comprehension: Every evening, I recap the day for the boys. I’ll always start by asking them, “What did we do today?” Until recently, they would always just stare at me and wait for me to tell them. But the other evening, I asked them, “Where did we see bubbles today?” and Matthew responded with, “Lie-bay (Library)!” And after Gymboree, I asked them which of their friends we saw, and Nate said, “Pey Pey! Ah!” (That’s Peyton and Oz.) The boys have also learned the appropriate responses for things. If you compliment them or give them something, they’ll say “thank you.” (In Nate speak, it sounds more like, “TANK!” In Matt speak, it’s, “TAY!”) I also love it when I tell Nate something and then ask, “How’s that sound?” He’ll say, “Good!” Or I’ll ask Matt if he wants to do something, and he’ll say, “Ya!” or “No.”

But my absolute favorite aspect of the boys’ personalities is how loving they both are. They love to show affection. Every now and then, Nate will make his way over and hug our legs, nuzzling his head on our thighs as if he’s a little cat. If you ask for a hug, he’ll almost always oblige, and he loves to blow kisses. He’s also a big cuddler! And Matt—gosh, that sweet little boy! I’ll be in the middle of doing something, and all of a sudden he’ll amble over and smile at me in a goofy way. I’ll say, “Hi, Matt!” and he’ll put his arms up. I’ll pick him up and he’ll cup my face in his hands, touch my nose with his, and give me a kiss on the lips. I kid you not. That boy is gonna be a ladies’ man when he’s older!

Well, that’s my update for now! We’ll be super busy with moving, the twins’ 2nd birthday party, and a trip to New York over the next few weeks, but I’ll do my best to keep you all posted.

P.S. As for the two-year photo shoot? Despite Nate’s tantrums, Julie managed to get some amazing photos! Here’s one shot of the two boys. I think it showcases their personalities perfectly!

Boys

Here’s one that shows off Nate’s blue eyes:

Blue eyes

And here’s a shot of me and my mini-me!

Matt and Mommy

My Boys Are Growing Up!

Last weekend we had a couple of other families over for a barbecue. There were three older boys at our home, and as usual, the kids retreated down into the basement to play and watch cartoons. But there was one glaring difference: For the first time ever, I did not have to stay in the basement to keep an eye on Matt and Nate, nor did I have to run downstairs a million times to check on them. I got to stay upstairs and enjoy some cocktails and adult conversation, and the boys seemed more than happy to have me out of their hair. And that’s when it hit me: MY KIDS ARE GROWING UP!

For the longest time, I couldn’t really enjoy get-togethers at people’s homes. The twins were just too little to navigate staircases on their own or to play nicely alongside the big kids. So I’d usually end up babysitting everyone‘s kids while they socialized, or Keith and I would take turns chasing our boys around the house while the other one choked down some food and said quick hellos to the other guests.

Even at our house, I could never just send the boys to the basement while we had company. If I tried to, one of them would come right back upstairs to beg for attention, or I’d constantly hear loud noises or crying coming from down there and have to go investigate.

But not this time. This time, I can honestly say I saw my boys only a few times all evening. I kept waiting for one of them to call my name—to need me for something—but they were perfectly OK! They watched Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, they shared their toys nicely with the other kids, and they truly enjoyed themselves without needing Mom and Dad right there. It was bittersweet: While it was very nice to have some time to relax and enjoy my friends’ company, it was also a bit disconcerting to realize my boys no longer need constant supervision. Before I know it, they’ll be rolling their eyes at me and saying, “Go away, Mom! You can’t play with us!” Sniff, sniff.

I’d be lying if I said the entire evening passed without incident. Nate did get a tiny cut on his lip from banging into the coffee table. And, after everyone left and Keith and I went down to clean up, we found this masterpiece waiting for us:

Door Art

Nothing a little Magic Eraser couldn’t fix!

 

A Long Way Home

Matt, Nate, and I just returned from another wonderful two-week trip to New York while Keith was in the field. Once again, the boys adjusted beautifully to being away from home, in a completely different environment and in a different time zone. I really love how adaptable they are—a quality that certainly comes with the military lifestyle. It gives me a great deal of hope that our upcoming move to LA will go smoothly and that Matt and Nate will adjust to their new home relatively quickly.

The boys got in lots of fun, quality time with their grandma and grandpa and the rest of the family. I also enjoyed many much-needed nights out without the kiddos. Heading into the city on the subway to hit the town with my friends and family, I felt like my old self again. I ate at great restaurants, hit up fun bars, went to the movies, and even took in a New York Rangers game. It was certainly a much-needed vacation for all of us.

The trip home? Not so wonderful. My Aunt Terry flew back with the boys and me because there is no way in hell I’d be able to handle them on my own. In fact, the two of us could barely handle them. I got to see firsthand how much “behind the scenes” stuff Keith takes care of when we travel to keep things running smoothly.

The fun started when my dad pulled up to the United Airlines terminal at LaGuardia Airport and none of us could get the car seats out of the car. My dad’s car has the latch system, and Keith had made sure to show me how to remove the seats. And I did know how to remove them. I just couldn’t do it. I felt like the latches were buried so deep in the seat I could barely get my hands on them, let alone unhook them.

After 20 minutes of the boys growing increasingly agitated as my dad and I fiddled with the seats, the curbside check-in guy took pity on us and removed them in three minutes flat.

But then we had another problem. I couldn’t seem to attach the seats tightly enough to our Go-Go Babyz Travelmates, which had been lifesavers for us in the past and are amazing items to have if you’re 99 percent of the population. But if you’re me and you’re a complete idiot when it comes to anything technical—yet you don’t bother to read the instruction manual—suddenly they became way less useful, and you end up dragging the kids through the airport without the wheels even spinning half the time because various straps are getting caught underneath them, and your kids are bouncing around in their car seats like they’re on a wooden roller coaster.

(This photo, from our much more peaceful flight in December, depicts how the Travelmates are supposed to work):

This photo, from our much more peaceful flight in December, depicts how the Travelmates are supposed to work. Oops...

Yet we made it onto our flight to Denver, and the boys were doing great. Then we sat on the tarmac for an hour and a half because of some technical difficulty. That’s when the boys’patience wore thin and they began to get whiny and fidgety. They calmed down once we were airborne, but they demanded constant entertainment for the next three hours, and only when we began our descent into Denver did they fall asleep.

We made it to Denver with about 15 minutes to spare before our short connecting flight to Colorado Springs was set to board. Piece of cake, right? Not when you come out of gate B25 and your next flight leaves out of gate B95. That’s SEVENTY GATES! But along we went, each with two carryon bags on our shoulders. Nate was so upset about having been woken up, he refused to sit in his seat. So I had to run through the airport while struggling to carry all 26 pounds of him, and poor Aunt Terry had to drag both of the rickety car seats behind her, one of which contained Matt.

Yet we somehow managed to get to B95, sweating profusely—only to find that our connecting flight was delayed. At this point it was 7 PM Colorado time (which was 9 PM to us since we had come from the east coast) and the boys were starving, so I started shoving whatever I could find in my bag—frosted strawberry Pop Tarts—down their throats. Then we boarded the plane and sat on the tarmac again for an hour—triple the time of the actual flight. Both boys fell asleep once the plane took off, but when we had to wake them 20 minutes later to deplane, all hell broke loose.

Once we got our three huge suitcases and managed to lug them, along with everything else, out of the airport and find the boys’ babysitter (who had driven our own car to come pick us up), we thought we could finally relax. But, oh yeah—now we had to get the car seats back into our car. And Nate was screaming bloody murder at the top of his lungs because all he wanted was to be asleep in his crib. And it was snowing.

We finally got home around 9:30 PM Colorado time—11:30 New York time—and the boys drank their milk and went to sleep fairly easily. Then Aunt Terry and I ate cereal and Nutella with crackers for dinner at midnight before we finally hit the sack.

It was a long way home. But two weeks later, here we are, and the whole crazy debacle is behind us. Now we can rest easy—until our big move in three months. Oh, brother…

 

*DISCLAIMER: I wholeheartedly recommend the Go-Go Babyz Travelmate. Just don’t be like me: Read the instructions!

NNNNNNNNNNNNO!

Well, folks, the time has come: My boys have discovered the word “no”—and they quite like it. In the past week, in fact, “no” has become the most-used word in Nate’s vocabulary. He will say it anytime and anywhere, even if he actually means “yes.” He responds to any question asked of him or of anyone else with “no.” The other day in the car, for instance, I asked Keith, “Should we give Matt a few more minutes to sleep before we go into Gymboree?” And before Keith could respond, we heard “no” from the backseat. Thanks for your input, Nate, but I was talking to Daddy!

Lately, Nate has been testing out different ways of saying “no”—different inflections, different voices. His latest is the ol’ toddler standby—holding the “N” for as long as humanly possible to really make his point. So if he is angry, or if you ask him to do something he really doesn’t want to do, he’ll tense up, put up his hands, and say, “Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnoooooo!!!” Lord, help us.

Why haven’t I mentioned Matt yet, you ask? Because sweet, agreeable little Matt doesn’t say “no” on his own. He only says it after Nate does, because he loves to mimic everything Nate says, like a little parrot. And it’s really cute, because he will repeat the word in the same tone Nate used, but he’ll exaggerate it so that it’s clear he is making fun of his brother. So Nate will say, “Nnnnnnooo!” and then Matt will say, “Nnnnnnoooo” in a mocking voice. It’s almost as if he’s thinking, “Get a grip, Nate! Quit being so disagreeable!”

One time when Nate wasn’t saying “no”? Last Sunday at the local Touch-A-Truck event, where the boys went absolutely bonkers. They didn’t know what vehicle to run to next, so they just zoomed around and around, climbing in and out of fire engines, police cars, delivery and moving trucks, and construction vehicles faster than we could take pictures. Really, if heaven is different for everyone, this event center was what Matt and Nate’s heaven would look like. Needless to say, the boys were pooped after an hour—so pooped, in fact, that Nate uttered not a single “no” when it was time to leave. Here’s a photo of my exhausted family standing in front of a fire engine before we left the event. Matt and Nate thought the fireman standing off to the side was totally cool!

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Lazy Mornings

I have always admired the moms who manage to get out of the house early with their kids. I’ve got friends who wake up at the crack of dawn and work out, shower, do laundry, and pretty much conquer the world before their kids even get out of bed. Then they show up at our 9:30 AM play dates looking gorgeous and put together with their hair and makeup done, their diaper bags well stocked. (You know who you are. Love you, ladies!)

I am not one of those moms. My kids are my alarm clock. I don’t stir until I hear them begin to babble and giggle through the baby monitor. Then I linger in bed as long as possible and check Facebook and email on my cell phone before I drag myself to their room to free them from their cribs. If they get up at 6:30, I get up at 6:30. If they get up at 7:30, I get up at 7:30.

It seems the twins’ wake-up time is on the later end whenever we have somewhere to be in the morning. This means I inevitably end up rushing to make it to the gym or to Gymboree or to the play date looking like the typically frazzled mom, bare-faced and in sweats. Then when I reach into the diaper bag to get a bib or a snack or something else important, I find that I left it home.

Still, there are many things I love about our laid-back morning schedule (or lack thereof). My absolute favorite? Our lazy breakfasts. Since the boys were born, they would sit with me (and Keith if he was home) and watch me eat breakfast, drink my coffee, and read the newspaper. They started out on the floor next to me in their Boppy Newborn Loungers, just staring at me or snoozing. Next, they graduated to their bouncers and drank their bottles while I ate. Then they moved into their high chairs and we started eating breakfast together. First they would eat their baby food, then whatever I was eating—pancakes, yogurt, cereal, etc.

Now, they’ve taken it a step further. Not only do Matt and Nate want to eat what I eat, but they want to read the newspaper with me, too! They’ll take any section, whether it’s the front page or the sports, and sift through it with pensive looks on their little faces. Sometimes they’ll fight over a section (especially a car dealership insert). They’ve even figured out how to look at the paper without knocking their food all over the floor. If Keith and I start reading headlines or articles aloud to each other, they’ll “read” theirs aloud, too. It is totally awesome.

Here is a photographic chronology of my boys during our lazy breakfasts:

I love the fact that Keith and I are instilling a love of reading—and of newspapers—in the twins. When they are adults and everyone is getting their news electronically on whatever new technology is out by then, my boys will probably be the last holdouts who refuse to get their news from anywhere but the good, old-fashioned newspaper. (Sometimes I already feel like one of the last holdouts!)

And while I do sometimes stress about the piles of dirty laundry, the errands I just haven’t gotten to, or the fact that we sometimes can’t manage to get out of our pajamas until noon, I really do cherish my lazy mornings with my family. I love not feeling rushed—playing with and reading to the boys, lingering over breakfast, and just spending quality time together.

That’s not to say I don’t wish I could suddenly become a morning person and start waking up early: That would allow me to get a jump on the day and still have that lazy family time. But the reality is, I am not a morning person. My numerous attempts to change that have been futile. So now, I just embrace it. If getting those extra, precious minutes of sleep in the morning means dealing with a bit of chaos later on—and sometimes leaving the house in mismatched clothes and no makeup—then so be it!

Taking Back My Purse

This morning I dug into my purse to retrieve my house keys. When I pulled my hand out, a half-crumbled Keebler peanut butter cracker went flying across the room. Flabbergasted, I peered deep into the abyss of my handbag and discovered four more disintegrating crackers just like it. The bottom of the bag was nearly covered with crumbs.

Had this been the boys’ diaper bag, I would not have been surprised in the least. But this was my “nice” bag—a fairly new black leather Coach shoulder bag. I didn’t even remember putting the crackers in them.

This inspired me to take a step back and review the contents of my purse. And then I realized why it always feels so heavy. Here is a list of what I pulled out:

  • Wallet stuffed with unorganized cash, credit cards, and store loyalty cards
  • Two sets of car keys (the ones I’d used earlier that day plus a “missing” set we’d been looking for
  • House keys (which I didn’t really need since the car key ring also included a key to the house)
  • Full container of mints
  • Empty container of mints
  • Half-filled box of Farm flash cards (The rest are scattered throughout my car’s backseat.)
  • Used, balled-up Boogie Wipes
  • Empty Ray-Ban sunglass case (because Nate broke my Ray-Bans and my new pair hasn’t arrived yet)
  • Mounds of assorted loose change
  • A capless pen
  • A green crayon with the tip broken off
  • A crusty old pacifier with lint stuck to the nipple
  • A Twizzler (the biggest mystery of all, since I don’t eat Twizzlers)
  • An empty plastic sleeve that once contained the Keebler crackers that were now all over the purse
  • About two months’ worth of grocery lists, unused coupons, and receipts for Babies “R” Us, Target, and children’s clothing stores

Needless to say, I promptly did a purse purge. But it was glaringly obvious how much my life has changed since becoming a mom. In my working, pre-mommy days, here is a list of what my purse generally contained:

  • Wallet
  • House keys (I didn’t drive when commuting to the city.)
  • Sunglasses
  • Mints
  • Lancome makeup compact
  • Lip gloss
  • Oil blotting papers for my face
  • Paperback novel (for reading on the subway)
  • iPod (to listen to on the subway)
  • Ballet flats (to change into after wearing my cute heels all day)
  • About two weeks’ worth of receipts from Dunkin’ Donuts, women’s clothing stores, and Manhattan bars and restaurants

Clearly, I was carrying a much lighter load before the kids came. I also cared a bit more about my appearance (or maybe I just had  more time to spend on it). I generally was able to keep my purse (and my house and car) a bit more clean and organized, and I actually had time to read and listen to music. Now, my reading consists mainly of board books (That’s Not My Tractor is quite a fascinating read), and I still have not had a chance to listen to the last album I downloaded months ago, Alicia Keys’s “Girl on Fire” (though the darn Shushybye songs from Baby First TV are so stuck in my head, I need a lobotomy to get them out).

But like my purse, my heart is infinitely more full since Matt and Nate arrived. And I’d gladly trade makeup and books for snot rags and toys any day. I’ll just try to remember to take a short break from the craziness and chaos of life with twins to clean out my purse once in a while! Now, the diaper bag is a whole different story…

18-Month Update: Better Late Than Never!

On January 19, the twins turned 19 months old! I can’t believe it, because I feel like their 18-month milestone passed by before I could even realize it. And now, they’re closer to age 2 than age 1. Yes, people: The Terrible Twos are quickly approaching!

The boys didn’t get their 18-month checkups until January 7 because we had been in New York for the holidays. It was their last well-baby visit, which means they are officially no longer babies. They’re toddlers. (Sniff, sniff. I’m having a my-boys-are-growing-up moment.) Here were their stats:

Matthew:
Height — 32 1/4 inches (40th percentile)
Weight — 23 lbs., 14.5 oz. (40th percentile)
Head Circumference — 49 inches (80th percentile)

Nathaniel:
Height — 32 3/4 inches (50th percentile)
Weight — 24 lbs., 10 oz. (50th percentile)
Head Circumference — 49 1/2 inches (90th percentile)

The major things you can take away from those stats are the following:

1. My boys have big heads.

2. Matthew has finally nearly caught up to Nate in height and weight and is no longer considered tiny for his age! Considering that he was only 3 lbs., 12 oz. at birth and was not even on the growth chart for a very long time, this is huge. Also, he was only in the 9th percentile for weight at his 15-month appointment, so he’s grown a lot in the past few months. (I guess a healthy appetite and a penchant for mac and cheese and penne all vodka will do that to a little boy!)

But the boys are growing by leaps and bounds mentally, too. It seems like every day, they say a new word or two. Just yesterday Nate called my dad “Pop Pop” for the first time, much to his grandpa’s delight. And last week, when I said “I love you” to Matt, he responded with “Ah lub yoo”, and I nearly died. Died. (Consequently, when I say “I love you” to Nate, he responds by blowing me a kiss. It’s pretty cool how he’s made the connection between kisses and love.) “Ball”, “car”, “Mama”, “Daddy”, “star” and “Uh oh!” (even when a situation does not warrant an “Uh oh!”) are also in frequent rotation in the boys’ vocabulary.

Matt and Nate know most of their animal sounds as well as the “Grandpa sound.” (I will ask them, “What does Grandpa say?” and they’ll make a snoring noise. I guess they’ve seen—and heard—Grandpa fall asleep on the couch one too many times!) They also know their shapes and are starting to learn colors, although so far they seem to only have mastered blue (A.K.A. “boo”).

The boys are still obsessed with cars and trucks. They basically flip their lids whenever they see one. During car rides, Nate will point out the window and yell, “Car!” when he sees a vehicle pass. So you can imagine what it sounds like: “Car! CAR! CAR CAR CARCARCARCARCAR!” The other day at the park, they spotted a garbage truck and waved to it. When the sanitation men waved back, they went nuts.

The boys also still love to read. Nate’s favorite book right now is I Can Be A Real Boy. Matt’s favorite is The Little Engine That Could. But Matt actually prefers magazines over books. (I guess he takes after his mommy!) He’ll become absorbed in any magazine he gets his hands on—Time, Entertainment Weekly, Sports Illustrated, and even random catalogs. He will carefully turn each page and then point furiously at any photo he finds interesting. (Bonus points if he finds a photo of a car or a truck.)

Their favorite toys right now—besides their plethora of cars and trucks, of course—are their KidKraft Around Town Train Set and Table, their Fisher-Price Little People play sets, their ball pit, their Buzz Lightyear Power Wheels, and their flash cards. But they have so many more toys that they love, and it’s amazing to watch their imaginations at work as they play with them. They also still love technology and are thrilled when we let them play with their kiddie apps on our iPhones or iPads. We even got them their very own VTech InnoTab 2s.

And they love animals—especially dogs. If we go to someone’s house who owns a dog, they’ll follow the dog around and pet it and wave to it. If a dog barks, they’ll laugh hysterically rather than get frightened. (Keith says this means we need to get a puppy. I say Keith is crazy!)

The twins are still enjoying Gymboree and Toddler Time at the library each week. They’re becoming much more physically adept, climbing and navigating the play structures at Gymboree and the playground like little monkeys. Believe it or not, Matt is a bit more careful, while Nate is fearless. Nate will dive down a slide head first without even batting an eyelash.

But with all of these wonderful developments comes toddler behavior of the less happy kind: tantrums. The boys are definitely becoming more opinionated with each passing day, and when they don’t get their way, they get angry. That means crying, screaming, throwing themselves on the floor, and kicking their legs furiously. They’re also becoming more independent and wanting to do things on their own, and when they fail, they’ll get really frustrated and throw a tantrum. A good example is when we went to P.F. Chang’s for lunch last week with some friends from Gymboree. Nate insisted on eating his lo mein by himself with a fork, but when the noodles kept sliding off the fork, he started to get agitated. When I reached over and tried to help him, he lost his mind and flew into a tantrum, and Traci (our babysitter) had to take him outside for the rest of the meal. Oh, life with toddlers.

All challenges aside, though, I am absolutely loving this age and seeing the world through the eyes of toddlers. The best part is when the boys drop what they are doing and run over to give me hugs, or when they reach up to me longingly so I can pick them up and cuddle with them. I still can’t believe my good fortune in getting to be Matt and Nate’s mommy. Here are a few photos from their recent 18-month-old photo session. They were taken by Julie Pearson of Julie Pearson Photography. Enjoy!

Boys 18 months

Matt 18 months

Nate 18 months

Matt baseball

Nate baseball

Family 18 months

Remembering a Wonderful Woman

Well, I am finally getting a chance to blog after an incredibly busy holiday season. We had a wonderful trip to New York during which we got to spend a lot of quality time with my family. We also got a chance to take Matt and Nate into Manhattan to do all the great Christmas things the city has to offer. We saw the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree, braved the madness of Toys R Us Times Square, rode the carousel and watched the ice skaters in Bryant Park, and just enjoyed walking around Midtown. We also took the twins to see the famous Dyker Heights Christmas lights in Brooklyn. It really meant a lot to me to finally have the boys experience the city, and I look forward to bringing them back often!

Unfortunately, our holiday trip also came with some sadness: My mom’s oldest sister—my Aunt Joanne—passed away December 18 after a lengthy battle with lung cancer. I don’t think it has really hit any of us yet. Aunt Joanne was an incredibly special woman with a gorgeous smile and a wonderful sense of humor. We will all miss her forever.

I’ll never forget when I was 15 years old and my parents went on a weeklong vacation with their friends. I had a new boyfriend and was just starting to partake in some rebellious teenage behavior, so they didn’t want to leave me home alone.

“You’re going to go stay with Aunt Joanne for the week,” my mom informed me.

Now, most 15-year-olds, when told their aunt is going to “babysit” them for a week, would protest and fight and basically make their parents’ lives miserable. But I was actually excited to go stay with Aunt Joanne! I remember having a great time that week, talking and laughing with her. She was just the right mix of motherly and cool: She cooked me delicious meals, set ground rules, and enforced my usual curfew, but she also let my boyfriend pick me up from her house without third-degreeing him, let me go out with friends without asking too many questions, and gave me my privacy during the marathon conversations I’d have on her home telephone.

Aunt Joanne had seven grandchildren (with an eighth on the way) with whom she was equally wonderful. That was just her way: She was everyone’s mom, taking care of and nurturing everyone. I was thrilled to have remained close with her as I got older.

When I met Keith and began this crazy Army life of frequent moves, it became harder to see and call people—including Aunt Joanne—as often as I used to. My career, two babies, and the time difference between here and New York have made it even more difficult. I often find myself feeling really isolated from family and friends. I miss being able to have long phone conversations with people. I miss seeing my family and friends back home on a regular basis. (Our long visits are great, but it sure would be nice to be able to drop in for a quick hello whenever I feel like it.) I absolutely hate missing birthdays and other happy occasions. But the worst part is being so far away during difficult times like this. That, to me, is the hardest thing about military life.

I didn’t get to see Aunt Joanne before she passed. We arrived in New York only two days later—a flight we’d booked three months prior. So, we at least got to be with our family for the services, and the boys got to cheer everyone up a bit. That made me feel better. But I would have given anything to have been able to see Aunt Joanne one last time. I know if I had lived near her, I would have visited her as often as possible. But I know she understands. That’s the thing about family—you can go weeks without talking, and when you do, it’s like no time passed at all.

Aunt Joanne was taken from us way too soon, but she still had a lot of blessings. She spent a lot of time with her sons, her stepchildren, her sons- and daughter-in-law, and her grandchildren. She was happily married to a wonderful man, my Uncle Jerry. They traveled often, to places like Las Vegas, Hawaii, and Monaco. She was close with her sisters and had lots of friends. She lived a full, happy life, and that is something to celebrate. So here’s to you, Aunt JoJo! I am so glad Matt and Nate got to know you!

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Me and Aunt Joanne at my 30th birthday party

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Aunt Joanne with a 2-month-old Nate

Thanksgiving = Success!

Every year for as long as I can remember, my Aunt Terry and Uncle Andy have hosted Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve at their house and my parents have done Christmas Day. (And I say “parents” loosely, as my mom always does 99.9% of the work. Sorry, Dad—I just call it like it is.) And every year, Mom and Aunt Terry spend the weeks leading up to their respective holidays running around in a frenzy trying to get everything done. Sure, I help Mom make the Christmas lasagna and bake some cookies to bring to Aunt Terry’s house. But for the most part, the rest of us get to eat lots of delicious food and revel in holiday cheer relatively stress-free.

A couple of years ago on Thanksgiving, as my aunt and uncle debated about whether the turkey was done and my cousin Kim and I stood at the kitchen counter stuffing our faces with chips, I looked at Kim in mock horror and said, “Oh, my gosh! One day we are going to have to do this!”

“Can you imagine me trying to cook a turkey?” Kim asked. “I’d probably burn down my house!”

Fast forward only two years, and suddenly, I found myself in charge of Thanksgiving. We decided to stay here in Colorado Springs this year since we’ll be heading to New York for Christmas. Much to our delight, Keith’s siblings, Pat and Ken, and Ken’s wife Beth and youngest daughter Ashley decided to fly out to spend the holiday with us.

Keith and I had absolutely no idea how to prepare a turkey. We didn’t even know what kind or size to buy. We envisioned a scene out of “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation”: We’d all be sitting cozily around the Thanksgiving table. Keith would make some kind of cheesy speech before cutting into the turkey, when it would promptly burst open with a sizzle. Everyone would give us fake smiles and tell us it was delicious as they proceeded to crack their teeth on the dry, overdone meat.

In an effort to avoid that horror, I began to prepare for the holiday a month ago. I asked my mom 800 questions about turkey prep, got her potato pie recipe, and began a shopping list. I called Aunt Terry and peppered her with questions about how to make stuffing. And I went online to find a few recipes of my own.

I’ll admit, I went a little crazy: This was my first holiday, and I wanted it to be perfect. I bought a roasting pan, a pretty turkey platter, a gravy boat, turkey lifters, a baster … you name it, I bought it, even if I had no clue how to use it.

About 10 days before the holiday, I began to drag Keith around town, gathering ingredients. We made several trips to the commissary, Safeway, and Costco. I dug out the china, fancy silverware and table linens a week before and insisted we set the table right then.

At one point in the middle of all the madness, I called my mom and shouted, “Holidays suck when you’re the one hosting them!” I didn’t really mean it, of course. It was my way of telling her I finally understood all of the hard work she and my aunt put into giving our family such memorable, fantastic holidays. And yes, I was a bit stressed out. But in reality, I was having a great time. After all, this is what the holidays are all about—shopping and cooking and decorating, all in preparation of bringing family into your home to make memories. I finally felt like a grown-up. I felt like a mom!

Even with all of my crazy preparations, things still did go wrong. Our microwave decided to stop working the evening before Thanksgiving. (Thank you, Wendi, for lending me yours!) The cheese slicer cracked while Keith was preparing the cheese and crackers. Mom’s potato pie didn’t cook long enough in the middle. (It was still delicious, though.)

But for the most part, everything was absolutely perfect. Our 16-pound Butterball was moist and cooked just right. The stuffing and other side dishes were sooooo yummy. And, because I got all of the hard work and stress out of the way ahead of time, I was able to relax and enjoy time with my family on Thanksgiving Day. Keith and I slept until 7 am and watched some of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade with the twins before starting on the food. Once the appetizers and side dishes were all prepared and the turkey was in the oven, we went out for a 45-minute walk with the family. We watched football, played with the boys, and drank my homemade sangria. And everyone had such a great time. All of that hard work and running around was absolutely worth it.

Us on Thanksgiving — a little blurry, but I love the smiles!

Getting ready to carve our first turkey!

The whole clan about to dig in (minus Pat, who always seems to be the one to remember to take the picture). No cheesy speeches were given!

I am super proud of myself and of Keith for successfully pulling off our first holiday! Even though the boys won’t remember it, I hope it was the first of what will be many happy holidays for them. And I hope you all had an equally fantastic Thanksgiving!

Now, Keith and I are ready to give the boys a Christmas they won’t forget. We have lots of fun things planned here in Colorado before we head to New York, where we’ll spend Christmas Eve and Christmas at Aunt Terry’s house and Mom’s house, like always. We can’t wait!

Christmas with Kids

I have always loved Christmas, and now that I have children, my holiday cheer has skyrocketed. Keith and I can’t wait to share all of the wonderful things about the holiday season with our boys.

In fact, Christmas is already in full swing in our house. We are already playing holiday tunes—the twins especially love “Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer” and “Frosty the Snowman”—and I’m nearly finished with my Christmas shopping. Last weekend, Keith took advantage of his four-day weekend and hung the lights on our house. (Don’t worry, they’re not lit yet.) And we just can’t wait to pick out and decorate our Christmas tree, put up our indoor decorations, watch all of our favorite holiday cartoons with Matt and Nate, and have all sorts of other holiday fun.

As we are planning all of that, though, we’re realizing just how challenging the holidays can be when you have little ones. For one, we are worried about the fate of our soon-to-be-purchased Christmas tree. Keith and I always get a real tree (you can’t beat that smell) and load it up with ornaments we’ve amassed together through the years—several of them rather delicate. And we plop it right in the middle of our living room.

But, like all kids their age, Matt and Nate are quite curious little fellows. Even with their 9 million toys in every corner of the house, they want to touch what they’re not allowed to touch. They open every drawer and door they’re not supposed to. If I leave my purse within arm’s reach, they dig my wallet out and dump its contents on the floor.

So, what exactly will they do when there’s a big tree full of shiny, sparkling ornaments right in the middle of their house? (I am having flashbacks to when my brother and I were little and we’d manage to knock over our Christmas tree at least twice every holiday season.)

Telling them not to touch the tree will only make them want to touch it more. I suppose we can hang all the non-breakable ornaments on the lowest branches. But even then, the thought of constantly having to re-hang them is exhausting. We are considering putting the tree in a corner of the living room where it would be blocked by the sofa and love seat. But that would cover half the tree and make us unable to put presents under it, which would take away a good deal of the fun.

In an attempt to preempt some of the problems, I bought the boys this toy Christmas tree. It has 24 ornaments they can take on and off and reposition to their hearts’ content. It even has two different tree toppers and a tree skirt. I plan to leave this tree right on our coffee table ottoman in the hopes that it might deter them from touching the real tree.

Another challenge is the fact that we spend Christmas in New York. Traveling with two feisty toddlers in tow is quite a hassle, to say the least, and never a fun thing for us or our fellow passengers. But what we’re even more worried about is how we will handle the whole Santa Claus thing on future Christmases. Right now, the boys are still too young to really know what’s going on. So, we’re having Christmas morning at our house before we leave for New York, and then they’ll open Grandma and Grandpa’s presents on the real Christmas morning at my parents’ house.

But starting next year, when the boys understand the concept of Santa Claus, how will we handle Christmas morning? Christmas mornings are something they will remember forever, like I do. Growing up, nothing beat the excitement of waking up in my own bed on Christmas morning, rushing to wake up my parents, and running downstairs to find all of my presents under the tree. So I would like the boys to sometimes experience Christmas morning in their own home. That’s a challenge as a military family, though, when you typically live far from loved ones and the place you grew up in. Once we get to DC in the summer of 2014, we’re hoping some of our relatives will spend some Christmases at our house.

But what about the years we do travel to New York? Will we just tell the boys that Santa Claus knows they’ll be at Grandma and Grandpa’s and will bring their presents there? If so, how will we then get their presents home? (This year, for instance, Santa is bringing them a train table—not exactly something you can check on a plane or stash in the car.) Or, should we tell them that Santa Claus comes early to visit the kids he knows will be away on Christmas Day? That seems like it will really take away the anticipation and excitement leading up to Christmas morning.

I know these are somewhat frivolous things to worry about when there are so many far worse things happening in the world. However, some of my most cherished memories are the holiday traditions my family has created for me since I was little. They are so important to me. I want Matt and Nate to grow up with their own traditions to pass down to their kids. I want them to one day feel the same warmth I feel when they think about their own childhood Christmases.

I know that many of my military friends with older kids travel for the holidays, so I’d love to hear from you: How do you handle being away from home on Christmas morning? Where and when does Santa Claus leave presents for your children? And to all my mommy and daddy friends: How do you keep your little ones from destroying your Christmas tree?

To get you all in the holiday spirit, here are a couple of outtakes from the boys’ Christmas photo shoot. The photos were taken by Julie Pearson of Julie Pearson Photography. She is wonderful, and we highly recommend her. Enjoy!

Nate, didn’t I teach you any manners???

Matt’s ready to go sledding!

Finally, a decent family shot!

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